Solo Sex Doesn't Fit The Biblical Pattern
Considering masturbation specifically, two things must be at the forefront: (1) because of our image-bearing, the Bible teaches sexual activity is reserved for marriage. It’s designed to be inherently relational, an aspect of deep knowing and intimacy with another, providing a context for the bearing and rearing of children. (2) In that context, the goal is giving wholly to the other, providing pleasure and joy in the deepest act of mutual vulnerability. This is particularly clear from 1 Corinthians 7:1–5, the only “how to” passage in the Bible prescribing sexual activity.
God designed sexuality to be like every other aspect of the Christian life: turning away from selfish desires to honor God with my body and use it to serve another. Sex in marriage should reflect the New Testament ethic in general. Describing discipleship, Jesus said, “For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45 ESV). Much more than a proof text for the atonement, this is the culmination of Jesus’ teaching on what it means to follow Him.
Multiple passages proclaim the Christian life is freedom from living for self. We live foremost for Christ and secondarily to love and bless others (see Gal. 2:20; 2 Cor. 5:14–15; Phil. 2:3–4; 1 Pet. 4:1–5). Jesus promises only when we live according to this pattern do we truly find life. (All four Gospels include this teaching. See Matt. 10:39; Mark 8:35; Luke 9:24; and John 12:25.) Living for “self” guarantees that true life and peace will elude us. This is particularly true of our sexuality. Ephesians 4:17–19 gives a chilling assessment that living for our own sexual desires signifies a “turning away” from God, leading to ever-increasing depravity and sexual insatiability.
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