God's Call

In 2 Corinthians 5:20, scripture says "we are ambassador's for Christ." Word Faith and Prosperity gospels tell us that God is calling us to do a certain job. But is this God's call, as it were?

When I chose to come back to Finland I decided against something important because thinking about it made me feel confused, and "God is not the author of confusion" (1 Corinthians 14:33), so it could not be of God. I left Finland due to feelings. I was feeling depressed and missing home. I thought that going back to Canada to do seminary was God's call for me. I based this decision on good feelings.

In Mark 6:45-50, this passage strikes me fatal to view. In verse 49—"they all saw him and were terrified." What was it they saw? It was in fact Jesus. They actually were looking right at Him, they saw Him on the water. And He was there to do them good, with nothing but love in His heart for them. But they misperceived Him, they did not see Jesus as Jesus, and they mispercieved the significance of what they did see. Instead, they saw Him as a ghost, a being that struck horror in their hearts. The emotions that seeing Jesus stirred in them were not peace, joy, love, and closeness to God. They were terrified, they were filled with alarm and fear at the sight of Jesus.

It was Jesus they saw; it was not Jesus they perceived. What they experienced did not mean what they thought it meant.

I thought I was doing God's will by studying seminary. But God doesn't ask us to play certain roles, does He? He calls us to bare witness to the world, to love on another like Christ loves the church, to speak the gospel to the unsaved, and to keep his commandments. But does he call me to be a fireman, a news reporter, or a paediatrician? How can a Christian discern that? If we are to take this logic seriously a Christian would be so confused and ask him/herself questions like, "Am I doing what God wants me to do? Was I supposed to marry this person? Were these kids supposed to be mine?"

We are constantly told, "Do what makes you happy." Is this what God asked us to do? Do what makes us feel good? Or should we live a life that glorifies God! I was looking at feelings as a good sign for a calling (as we are told) for me. Our faith must rest on scripture, not on feelings.

God's hand, His presence in an event, is discerned (we're told) by the feelings of serene peace, joy, love, and/or closeness to God that we feel. If it makes us happy, if it makes us feel close to God, then it is of God. If it's frightening and repellent, God cannot be in it. It sounds disconnected with scripture, yearning for something God never promises, countless Christians read feelings, circumstances, events, hoping to discern God's personal coded messages in them.

We are told that we should find out what God wants us to do and if it feels good and brings you closer to God, then do it. But is it biblical? I just lately had to ask myself this. Why do I feel so confused and frustrated? That's not God! And it's not aligned with scripture from what I know. I by-no-means am saying I know better, but I'm sceptical about this. And I am in no way saying that you shouldn't do what makes you happy. But is it scriptural?

We live in a self-esteem generation with a lot of self-help books. I am concerned that it has seeped it's way into the church and it just doesn't align with what scripture says. What do you think?