A Roman's Identity and Honour

It was to others that a Roman had to look for any confirmation of his ability and identity.
In Roman society confirmation by others was sought as well as required. Be they the elders of his family, his patron or his clients, army comrades, or even - in an election - the people of Rome; no Roman could be his own judge, but could see himself only through the eyes of others.
One needs also to consider that Romans didn't know of modern day psychology and hence did not analyze their thoughts and feelings. They looked not inwards but to others to understand themselves. For it was the opinion of others which dictated the opinion a Roman ultimately held of himself.
'A good man' was hence a man deemed worthy by others, a man deemed honourable. But so too, in the Roman mind set honourable was only what was actually honoured. Glory or honour were also measured only in the recognition it drew from others.
Great, noble deeds might be done, but without people knowing of them there was no glory, no fame and no advantage to be gained from them.
And to Romans the only advantage to be gained from glory and honour was to use it to climb the social ladder. Any credit among one's fellow men gained by one's ability, either in office or on the battlefield, was immediately used to further one's political fortunes; all in the hope of finally achieving that distant goal - a seat in the Roman senate.
Hence any achievement was blatantly bragged about to make absolutely sure everyone knew about it. And anyone too dignified to do the bragging oneself, simply found others who would do it for them.
And so in Rome, where nobility, military and political leadership were all intertwined, there would be no end of bragging, showing-off and a boundless supply of flattering rumours.

But in a society in which so much depended on the light in which others saw you, their view could not only elevate you, but so too it could destroy you.

Any news, be it good or bad, spread like wildfire in a society that spent much of the day gossiping in the public baths, or mingling at the forum. Graffiti was scribbled on walls, and in the inns drunken songs might ridicule the high and mighty. In the theatres actors would in their plays praise or deride public figures of the day.
And so Rome was a city of rumours, for the entertainment of the many and for the advancement of those whose worst fate could be, not to be talked about.

Nobility

Nobility was not simply bestowed upon an individual. It was gradually built up or torn down by a family. 'Three fathers' was the duration required to establish a man's noble status. The father, grandfather and great-grandfather had each to have exercised a higher magistracy. In other words, for a child to be noble, it was essential that he had been subject solely to the authority of relatives who were magistrates. Even the nobility of Octavian, whose great-grandfather had been a mere freedman, was called into question. It mattered little that a man's family had been noble in the past, an interruption of the three generations was all it took to deprive him of his noble status.


Resource: http://www.roman-empire.net/society/society.html